THUMBS UP.

This is Megan Fox.
You know this.
Have you ever noticed her thumbs? No?
Google the phrase "megan fox thumbs."
Game changer? No?
Well, leave her alone.
You're totally vibe crushing right now.
This was just an excuse to post Megan Fox pictures.
You know this.
Megan, holler back for this dope blog.

GOT IT ALL.

What's that? Two body painted posts in a row?
No Doubt.

Yes it's girl's soccer.
And, yes you're a perv for hoping for a Brandi Chastain situation.
You're Gross.

The full re-cap is here.
Again, it's girl's soccer so who cares, amiright?

NFL WEEK 4 PICKS

Do You Think I'm Pretty?

No.

NFL Week 4 Picks

Baltimore Ravens (+1.5) @ Pittsburgh Steelers (-1.5): 1 PM

• Ched says: Bawlmur, hon.

Carolina Panthers (+13.5) @ New Orleans Saints (-13.5): 1 PM

• Ched says: Who dat. You can bet your TV on this one.

Cincinnati Bengals (-3.5) @ Cleveland Browns (+3.5): 1 PM

• Ched says: Jake Delhomme and a white running back. Child please. Cinci covers the spread.

Denver Broncos (+6.5) @ Tennessee Titans (-6.5): 1 PM

• Ched says: The Titans are dangerous.

Detroit Lions (+14.5) @ Green Bay Packers (-14.5): 1 PM

• Ched says: No chance the Lions win, but they can keep it within 2 TD's.

New York Jets (-4.5) @ Buffalo Bills (+4.5): 1 PM

• Ched says: The Beast Mode resurgence won't be enough. Jets win easily. Now let's go eat a god damn snack.

San Fransico 49ers (+6.5) @ Atlanta Falcons (-6.5): 1 PM

• Ched says: "I thought the blacks in Baltimore were bad...turns out, there nothing compared to these fags you got out in San Fransico."- Kenny Powers.

Seattle Seahawks (-0.5) @ St. Louis Rams (+0.5): 1 PM

• Ched says: Not quite sure of the stunt Steve Spags and the Rams pulled last weekend, but look for them to bounce back to their old ways come Sunday afternoon.

Houston Texans (-3.5) @ Oakland Raiders (+3.5): 4 PM

• Ched says: Texans could win by 80.

Indianapolis Colts (-8.5) @ Jacksonville Jaguars (+8.5): 4 PM

• Ched says: Peyton Manning in a divisional game. Simple as that.

Arizona Cardinals (+8.5) @ San Diego Chargers (-8.5): 4:15 PM

• Ched says: They squeaked out a win against the Raiders last week. I like them at +8.5, but the Chargers will come away with the win

Washington Redskins (+6.5) @ Philadelphia Eagles (-6.5): 4:15 PM

• Ched says: McNabb will come home and steal the show, as Vick struggles for the first time this season. I like the Skins outright.

Chicago Bears (+3.5) @ New York Giants (-3.5): 8:30 PM

• Ched says: Last week, the Bears took down the Packers to remain undefeated, while the Giants got smoked by my Titans. To add to that, Eli Manning is still a boob and Jay Cutler still doesn't care, which is why the Bears will move to 4-0.

New England Patriots (-0.5) @ Miami Dolphins (+0.5): MNF 8:30 PM

• Ched says: The Dolphins offense tore apart the Jets D last Sunday night. The Pats D is a joke so look for Brandon Marshall to go off and the Dolphins to come away with the win.

CHECK PLEASE.

Cream get the money.

Dallas Cowboys wide-out and, not-your-fucking-bellhop, Dez Bryant got stuck with the tab. Bryant and teammates went out to celebrate their first win of the season after beating Houston on Sunday. The problem, Roy Williams' spiteful little soul, Williams invited the whole team out with them and when the check came it fell in Bryant's lap, probably after bouncing off Williams chest pads on an eight yard slant from Romo. The bill came to 54,896 American dollars. At twenty percent that's roughly $11,000 on the tip, who are we kidding? Bryant left a five and asked the server if he had to pay at the hostess stand.

WE'RE DOUBLE DIPPING.

Productivity is at an all time low.

ALABAMA. ARKANSAS.

ALL APOLOGIES, NEVERMIND.

Homecoming season is just around the corner.
Beibs will have so much to talk about.

-via buzzfeed and blameitonthevoices.

PANDAS: STRAIGHT GANGSTER.

Pandas peddling provolone.

THEY SEE ME ROLLIN', THEY HATIN'.

Noted beard aficionado and incomplete pass creator, Braylon Edwards was pulled over and charged with a DUI early Tuesday morning. B-Eazy was popped at 5:13 a.m. in Manhattan blowing a .16, twice the legal limit. Braylon was cooperative with the cops, explaining how he was just testing out a new study he had recently read about. As a Michigan grad, research is very important to him, you see. And, as a soon to be former Jet, handling his booze is even more important to him.

WHAT CAN CHEDDAR DO FOR YOU?

Delivering everything you want.

And, a lot you don't need.

COME ON IN, THE WATER'S FINE.

You know the deal. Go watch the footballs.

JUST AIN'T GONNA WORK OUT.

Mayer Hawthorne - No Strings (Classixx Original) by stonesthrow

FUCKING HIPSTERS.

Why?

ET TU REGGIE?

Sir, a Mister Bush is on the phone.

Hey, Reggie.
We were hoping to hear from you.
Yeah we heard.
That was a real class move.
It's just, we got your package today.
No, we totally appreciate you overnighting it.
It's just not what we expected.
We know you have all of that screw you NFL Money.
But, this? This is not what we expected at all!
I'm not trying to yell Reggie but, c'mon.
I thought we made some headway last week.
Alright, let's just calm down.
Truce?
Ok, Bro, just get it to us ASAP.
Oh hey, remember.
Fool me Once...
Hello?

I don't know Kanye, how do you think that went?

CLINTON, WE GET YOU.

Clinton, we know you were misunderstood.
You were talking about the ladies covering ChedCon 2010.

Australian for twins.

Jump to 16:05 for the goods.

DRUNKS VS HIGHS

DRUNKS vs. HIGHS from ulteriorproductions.com on Vimeo.

ART CHEDUCATION.

You know that Art History class you're taking?
Yeah the one at 8 a.m., on the other side of campus.
Don't worry about it.
We've got you covered.

WE MADE IT.

Check back later for a recap of today's games...in the meantime, don't call me. Text me.

JAI GURU DEVA OM.

Not what you expected?

HEAD ON A SWIVEL.

Well, we're fucked.
A stack of blank DVD's and a water pipe.
No, that's not ours Officer.

Your defense?
Insert comment here.

CARNIES, WHO NEEDS 'EM?

Just give me my fucking ice cream cone.

JUST GOING TO GET HOT DOG BUNS, IS THERE A PROBLEM OFFICER?

This, ladies and gentlemen, is our boy Ron Artest. Ron Ron was pulled over on Monday while driving an indy car through the City of Angels. He was cited for expired tags, gangster, not speeding or driving a ridiculous go-fast-car like an idiot. The officer walked away saying "Man, that could have gone worse."

YOUR DAILY DOSE.

Side-boob.

Just sit down, grab a j-dogg, enjoy the ride.

100 posts.
Where's the cake?

BLASTED IN THE FACE, GALLAGER STEEZE.

Gallagher on line 3.

THREE HOUR TOUR.

Add this to the list of reasons, we're not going on a cruise.

HATERS GON' HATE

This isn't going to be easy.
The tide seems to be turning on us.
We know, 49 out of 55.
On the same field as Matt Leinart.
Every other starter got the night off.
Wait a tick?
Do you think that means what we think it means?
No, Shanny wouldn't do that.
Has he said anything to you?
He won't talk to us.
He's kind of a prick any way.
We adore you.

MORE ROOM FOR THE ESPY'S.

Grace, would you get me Mr. Bush's daytime number.

Hey Reggie, it's Craig over at the Heisman Trust.
Oh you know, pretty good.
Just normal Labor Day stuff.
How was yours?
Well that's what I was calling about.
Yeah, this is awkward, but we're going to need that back.
No, what?!?
Are you serious?
We're not giving it to Vince.
We've already got someone else in mind.
So, just drop the trophy in the mail and we should be good.
Alright Bud, it's been real, gotta go.

REVIS ISLAND RE-OPENS.

The New York Jets and star cornerback, Darrelle Revis have agreed to a new 4-year, $46 million deal, ending his 36-day holdout.

That noise you just heard in the distance was a collective "fuck you" from every #1 wideout in football. If you listen a little harder you might be able to hear Rex Ryan rubbing out some knuckle-children. On second thought, since we care about our readers, don't do that.

If you've been wondering what Revis has been doing, check the track with Mac Miller below.

HOUSH-YO-MAMA, HON

Welcome to B-More.

Days after being cut by the Seattle Seahawks, veteran wide receiver TJ Houshmanzadeh has agreed to a 1-year deal with the Baltimore Ravens, joining Anquan Boldin and D-Mason on the list of weapons for the walking unibrow, Joe "The Show" Flacco. To make room for Housh, the Ravens traded Mark Clayton and a 7th round pick to the Rams for a 6th round pick.

Also, Troy Smith, former Heisman Trophy winner and one of our favorite QB's here at the Ched, is on his way out of the Land of the O after agreeing to a 1-year deal with the San Fransico 49ers. He will be playing behind two ex-#1 picks in Alex "Tiny Hands" Smith and David Carr for the time being.

"I gotta tell ya, I thought the blacks in Baltimore were bad, but turns out, they're nothing compared to these fags you got in San Fransico."

JOHN MAYER IS FUNNY?

The video on the left is John Mayer doing the play-by-play for a Dustin Pedroia at-bat and the video on the right is him announcing where he will be taking his talents this summer/fall. Both entertaining.

Below is the 20 minute John Mayer Show. Also entertaining.

"What we're going to play for you now, is a little thing we like to call 'Brandon Gets Picked Up From Jail After A Drunk-Driving Accident, Thank God Nobody Was Killed'."

"like...It's an areola, it's not a helipad."

TAKING U OUT OF OUR LABO(U)R DAY PLANS.

One last go round for the fresh fresh.

Monkey Business, y'all.

Resume radio silence.

HAPPY LABOR DAY.

Jackpot.

If you missed the first installment of Hot Carl's Hotfire, click here.

WHERE'S ROB?

In related news, Cleveland Steamer has been missing from The Ched since he predicted the future back in the first days of The Stinky Cheddar's existence. However, rumors are beginning to swirl that a return could be made in the coming days. Be on the look out, but don't count on it.

GET PREPERRATED.

Ladies, it's great to see you.
Bottoms up.

Darrelle Revis has been using his hold out for good and not for evil.

CUT IT OUT, KEEP IT UP.

A little more free time isn't always bad.

Cut It Out.

- Matt Leinart, Fast Willie and, Housh... We don't know how to tell you this, the tribe has spoken. You gots to go.

- NCAA Football is back, this is a good thing. College Football Live is also back. Lou, Mark and, Rece, fucking cool it.

- Low-rider bikes, knock it off, you don't look cool. Unless, you're a straight cholo then, carry on.

- You fucking hipsters, just stop it. Your jeans are just making everyone else physically uncomfortable. Go listen to Death Cab and leave us alone.

Keep It Up.

- Sam Bradford, put the clipboard down.

- Animals. Keep on keeping on.

- This will never not be funny.

- Bacon, we've spoken about you before but, today is your day. Keep it up bacon, keep it up.

- Uncle Joey from the parquet. Don't ever cut it out Joey.

Today is your day, enjoy it.

RIDE IT OUT.

We'd be the guy off to the side, tapping the wooden block.

And you're sure it's the only cure?

YAHOOZEN, YAHOOZEN.

For those of you living under a rock in a cave with a blanket over your rock, the college football season officially kicks off tonight.

No. 2 Ohio State vs. Marshall and no. 15 Pitt-Utah will offer the most excitement. No. 14 USC at Hawaii will offer the most twins. Either way exciting.

Also, this season Nike will be rolling out their newest NFL BLITZ inspired "throwback" jerseys. They all look like the flag football jerseys at ENCOM. Take the good with the bad, we suppose.

TOLD YOU v2.08

Ladies, to your health.

So, get this.

....abstaining from alcohol does tend to increase one's risk of dying, even when you exclude former problem drinkers. The most shocking part? Abstainers' mortality rates are higher than those of heavy drinkers.

Yeah dog. That's TIME, the magazine. Yeah, the one from the doctor's office. While the rest of you were doing useless shit, like studying and working, we were figuring out how to live forever. So, whats up now?

Hey man, you can't take it with you.
Plus, we paid last night.

ATTEMPTING TO BRING SEXY BACK.

Whoa, you're going out in that?
Nothing.
It's just like a 100 degrees out there.

Here are some things to help you beat your heat.

- Your Christopher Walken fix.



- Carl's Jr. You officially have the gayest commercials out there. Congrats? While you have that menu open, take a peek at the nutritional info, terrifying.

- Your Fail fix.

Straight lampin'

O-H-

The rumor mill has been spinning out of control recently. It seems the Big Ten/Eleven/Twelve will announce plans for conference realignment today.



According to reports Michigan and Ohio State will be split into two different divisions and will still play each other in their last games of the season. There will be also be "protective cross-overs" for Illinois-Northwestern and Wisconsin-Minnesota. Good to hear, The Ched always uses protection.